Silent Cry

I can't seem to scream or yell or shout, they no longer come out.
My yearning for a release seems not to come soon enough.
I don't know whether or not my pains will be able to be contained.
I open my mouth for some sort of sound, but, only silence....
What was once pure, full, and boisterous has now been conatined.
Emotions are on hold, put on mute...
they are no longer for display as in a Carnival Freak Show..
they have their own place to hide and to be shown to no one because they are so far hidden, I don't know if I know where they are located any more.
I can't look in to a mirror, the image is too obscure, it is no longer in focus...
There are only wispy lines and jagged edges, to something that used to be so aligned and free flowing yet solid...
The peace that was once sought to calm the beast inside of me down is in search of new meat that is lying aroud and since I can no longer supply the large demand, it has left me in Silence...
I lie still to hear a sound, any sense of life that may surround me,
but, only the Silence remains by my side...
A wimpering noise exits my lips and a tear strolls down my cheek,
there still are some emotions there, I thought they had all gone...died...
Yet, somewhere in this dark pit, which I assume was an endless abyss of nothingness,
somethiing has apeared..
Is it hope? It is a guide? Is it the peace I had been hoping to find?
Will I reamin forever green and not know what truths there may be?
I cannot open my mouth to let a voice exit and invite this new thing in...
so silently in a dark corner in the fetile positioin I await this new "thing" to come..
But, there is nothing approaching..
just a cold harsh wind slapping my face...
I can faintly feel its prescence, but, it is there...
I assume it is waiting for me to gather my strength and regain my momentum..
I will, I know it..
but for now, I remain in this corner with my thoughts, and my sorrow till I can fully face tomorrow and
no longer Cry Silently.